As the year is coming to an end, I look back to a terrible emotional year. Very terrible, there have been times of joy but the dark periods overshadow those.
During the summer, I met a guy; let’s call him X.
Facts about X and I; there is a 15year age gap between us. Yes, I like ‘em older (*closes face*).
He is good looking, educated, supposedly comfortable financially; I mean he has a job. The only aspect of X that I didn’t like was his obvious Igbo accent.
Within two weeks of meeting, we were already in [great] like of each there. I wouldn’t call it love because I’m pretty sure that I was not head over heels in love with X, at that time. We never had sex but we made out a lot. So, I am still kind of a virgin (see bio). At the end of those two weeks in August, I resumed college and I had to come back to the states. We officially became boyfriend and girlfriend. We tried to keep in touch despite the time difference. He was caring and low-key jealous. I write low-key jealous because there was a time my FB profile picture was of a platonic male friend and me and he was complaining about that. I changed the picture for him though. X and I were not even in a relationship on FB.
This has been the farthest relationship that I’ve been involved in, in terms of distance. But I really liked X and decided to make it work. It was a plan for me to go visit him during my fall break, in October but that never happened. That was because he was to purchase my flight ticket but never did. He told me that his money was tied up in an unfortunate business transaction overseas, four days before my fall break. I was pissed for a while, not because he couldn’t afford the ticket but because he led me on to believe that he was going to purchase it before dropping the bomb on me at the last minute. I had made plans for the October trip, done my hair, taken care of my academic responsibilities, purchased naughty lingerie, and mentally prepared myself of possibly losing my virginity to him. But hey, all those things were to no avail. After this incident, the relationship began to turn sour. The vibe was turning down but I still liked X a great deal.
He promised and swore to make it happen for my thanksgiving break in November. But the same thing happened; he claimed that there was no money still to buy the flight ticket. This time around, he told me two weeks earlier. Truth is that I had the money to purchase the ticket but I believe that the man should come see the lady first or make arrangements for the lady to visit him, otherwise. Also, I am a student and he is a 30-something year old worker.
After he told me about the November impossibility, X didn’t contact me again until two weeks later. Who does that? I was so pissed but I didn’t contact him either and you know lack of communication kills a relationship. I was already falling out of [great] like with X. when he resurfaced two weeks later, I told him off, low-key accused him of possibly seeing another woman, in his part of the world and he kind of hung up on me. Though, he remained apologetic during the whole period, I mentally broke up with him.
Then, I decided to call him two weeks after the annoying conversation with some great news. Great news = I will be in his city, from Jan 2011 for some months. He was excited about it and we behaved like nothing awkward had been happened between us. He promised to call me back the next day but he never did.
It has been a month, since then. X hasn’t called or even asked of me. Skype, he hasn’t logged into. His FB account is dead as usual. I definitely know we are no longer dating. But what have I done to deserve such an unfortunate relationship and uncertain closure. I still have some feelings for X.
Should I call him today? Or should I wait to get till I get to his city next month??
Or maybe I should just forget about him because it’s obvious that he really isn’t into me?
lesson: LDRs are really difficult to maintain. A very few work out tho. I don't think the first months of any r/ship should be long-distance. You really need to get to know each other before you start singing love songs to each other, over oceans and time zones. I remember lonely nights, painfully missing him and emotional skype dates. Wow, I don't want to be in a r/ship with X anymore tho but I just want to make sure that he is ok. 1 month and we've not talked, to imagine that my case is that of a silent break-up.
